For you

http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2014/08/28/the-price-of-admission-dan-savage/

My bestie, Marty

The other day, Marty said to me, "You're a better girlfriend to me than my girlfriend and you're not my girlfriend. We talk about everything. You check on me. I'm sick of it." He broke up with her after that. Since then she has tried to make contact with him and even texted him, "I love you". Why is it that when people think you don't want them anymore they're intrigued and try to get you back? Maybe she didn't have plan "B" lined up yet. It seems like people are always really ready to truly move on when they have someone else to move with and focus all their attention on. It's that old the grass is always greener theory. But I know of several people whose exes have later told them it was a mistake and they didn't know what they had when they had it and the grass isn't always greener. There are weeds, it needs mowed, while trying to weed eat the string keeps breaking. It's strange to me that people seem so ready to throw in the towel thinking there is someone else better for them instead of thinking they're lucky they found someone who will tolerate their bullshit shenanigans since once you get to know someone it's a weird dichotomy because of their eccentricities that make them who they are. It seems that today people don't really feel lucky when someone is willing to tolerate them. It seems like they feel entitled to it and like it's no big deal that someone is willing to put up with their crap and look for the good in them.  

Too many women

One of my friends kept saying he wasn't ready to date or be in a relationship. He used my OKCupid account to do some online shopping and then registered with the site. In the mean time, he kept running into women he had known in the past and started seeing one of them and then one more. So now he is seeing two women.Sometimes he has dates with both of them in the same day. He seems a little over worked. I asked why he just doesn't pick one of them and move forward with a relationship. He said he can't right now. Both women have qualities he likes but he thinks deep down he isn't ready for a relationship. I said, "You must be or you wouldn't be dating." It could be as simple as neither one is the ONE.

Eternal optimist

My former supervisor is always telling me that I am an eternal optimist because I always think things are going to get better. But I had an epiphany Friday. There are times when you should say, "I'm done". When you realize you are always making concessions, just say, "I'm done". If you realize that someone is one of those people you're always making excuses for, just say, "I'm done". If someone says they're your friend but you're the one who makes the effort, just say, "I'm done". If you realize you're always doing the heavy lifting, just say, "I'm done". And, if someone says that they're not really good at being friends you should believe it and say, "I'm done". After all it's so much more rewarding to be friends with people who realize that you are a good friend and appreciate you rather than those people who think you're their friend because they're great not because you're great. One of my good qualities is my undying loyalty to friends but it's something I don't want to give to everyone. 

Illusive/distant people

Trying to date or be friends with illusive/distant people is like being on a job interview. It's so much work that it's just not worth it. It's too hard to try to say all the right things all the time and perform all the time.

Interesting read

http://www.singleswarehouse.co.uk/2014/08/tips-on-avoiding-time-wasters-when-dating/

Becky & Viviana are cooking dinner

Finally

My friend, Norm, has been dating online for 17 years and finally met someone so there is hope. 

Successful marriages

end in death.

If The L Word was made for women

there would be a lot more talking and a lot less sex.

The L Word

After talking about The L word with a couple of friends and trying to figure the whole thing out, I have an idea. The target audience must be men not lesbians. First, no one would make a series for a target audience which  is such a small segment of the population. Second, I don't think the target audience is women because there is way more nudity and sexual content than most women like. All of the visual stimulation would appeal to men but not women. I will say naked women are definitely more appealing than naked men, especially as fat as people are today (in the U.S.). Third, a great deal of the content depicts lesbians in a similar light as generalizations made about men that aren't necessarily true e.g., all men think about or want is sex. 

OKCupid algorithm

I get messages from many men who have nothing in common with me. I don't know why a man or woman would write someone with noting in common and a low match score. 

Medbox

I bought some more Medbox stock today.

A year ago Friday

Last year, my friend, Ronni, and I drove to Houston to meet the monkey man (some primatologist from somewhere in Louisiana, she met on eHarmony) and a guy I met on OKCupid. It ended up costing too much money and worse, time which you never get back. It's possible to get more money but time spent is gone.

Message on OKCupid from a nimrod

I could patch your little broken wing and set you free. If you come back than I'd know you were mine

New life

I have been very busy starting my new life so I have neglected the blog a bit. It doesn't mean my male friends haven't been asking me what women are really saying because they are just as confused as ever. One of my friends thought he had decided to date a woman and as soon as he did another woman started showing more interest in him. Now, he is busier than all get out trying to keep up with two women. And more confused than ever and says his life is complicated.

My other closest male friend has been seeing two different women for some time. One is available so of course, he doesn't want to be with her. The other is not available so he can't let go. We always want what we can't have. So many people have said that o me lately, it's like a broken record. When people say it, it is like it's some sort of explanation for the phenomenon but it's not. It just makes the mystery more pronounced and confusing for me. I'd like to get to the bottom of it.

The most important person in my life told me that he would be so happy if he could be married with kids and a job. That's what he wants. And, that's what he has told me for almost his whole life. I guess he equates that with normal. Sadly, he didn't get to be part of a nuclear family growing up.

Twice, in less than a week I have someone leave me a voice mail without giving me any contact information. Once, the person didn't even identify herself. I don't know how I could get back with someone without fundamental information. 

New job

I started my new job today. 

Back in my new digs

I had a great trip to Corpus Christi. I am preparing for my new job which starts Monday.

Birthday

Spending the day with Becky & Viviana for Becky's birthday.

Being friends with an ex is possible

http://www.singleswarehouse.co.uk/2014/04/how-to-be-friends-with-your-ex/

This is too familiar

http://www.drwendywalsh.com/blog/2014/04/great-sex-bad-relationship/

First post from my new place

http://www.singleswarehouse.co.uk/2014/08/online-dating-cliches-heading-for-disaster/

Scary

Moving

Moving people for a living would have to be one of the worst jobs. Thank goodness for college (more proof that education makes people the renewable resource).

Movie time

Watching Napoleon Dynamite